Reasons To Stay Single

I am asked time and time again, why I am single,  And I have shot out answers just to brush off the question, because honestly, why I am or am not with anyone is nobody's business but my own.  But ya know?  I have thought about this answer.  First off, I am single because I want to be.  Now the question is... why do I want to be?  Hmmm, that list of reasoning is so long, but I will try to shorten it.

First of all, I have been in many relationships.  Each one taught me something, and narrowed my tolerance of the things that people do.  At my forty-something age, I am pretty sure that I didn't live this long by needing someone to look out for me.  And it seems that a man's purpose in his life is to tell me how to live MY life.  While some women thrive on this kind of guidance, I do not.  I have worked very hard for my independence and I am not about to let some man strip it from me.

A man seems to think that they are in the market for a Mother.  Someone to cook for them, do their laundry, clean the house, pay the bills, while they sit around and do nothing all day.  Really?  No.  I am not taking care of someone just because they think it is their entitlement.  I raised my children to be independent and to fend for themselves, I am not about to take care of an overgrown mama's boy.

Ownership is nine tenths of the law.  Maybe in the eyes of others, but not in mine.  I worked for it, I paid for it, it's mine.  I will SHARE what I have, but it is certainly not yours!  I didn't create those bills you keep racking up because you don't have the sense to stay out of the bar, I am not going to pay them.  We are not, nor will we ever be married, therefore, what's mine is MINE, what's yours is YOURS!  Hell, it was even that way when I WAS married.  However, my basement is full of relationship souvenirs.  These are the things that came into the relationship by the other party, but when the other party exited, the crap stayed behind!

Let's talk insecurity!  I realize that people go through shit in life and it has a tendency to stay with you and become a part of who you are.  I get that.  But, seriously, move on!  There is a reason it's PAST!  Don't bring some other relationship drama into a relationship with ME and think that it is going to go anywhere, cause it won't.  That is relationship suicide!  My PAST relationships have no bearing on my current except for the lessons I have learned.  If I look at another man, it is not because I want him or he wants me.  If I TALK to another man, OMG, that is all I am doing is TALKING.  I just can't get past the "ownership" mentality of men.  I am NOT property!  You do NOT own me!  I had friends BEFORE you and my friends will still be here AFTER you!  It's been proven through and through.

The disappointment that comes from men who just have no ambition to get up and do things is beyond me.  Not to mention the countless dates that have been broken, which I had been looking forward to by the way, because of lazy men who only think of themselves.  If I am going to look forward to something in life, it best happen unless it is by an act of God!  Otherwise, your setting yourself up to be very disappointed when I tell you to take a hike!

And then there is the physical/mental abuse part of some men.  I want a man who completes me.  A relationship is supposed to make you a better person all the way around.  Men who take their frustrations out on a woman, should be rendered worthless.  A man who HITS a woman or degrades her, disrespects her or strips her of anything that is considered self worth, really needs a swift kick in the balls.  That is not a man, that is a low life piece of shit.  Now, I recognize that some of the behavior is mental illness, or maybe even stems from some sort of abuse in his past.  However, there are therapists, medications, support groups.  All he has to do is get some help.  But men and their stupid pride... they are too PROUD to get help!  Really?  It's really beyond me!

The single life really is not all that bad.  I do what I want, with who I want, how I want and at the end of the day, there is no drama, no fighting/arguing, and it works for me.  I did get a dog, that was a good relationship move I do believe.